Dreaming

“It’s just a dream I keep having. It doesn’t mean anything.”

I’m starting to wish I hadn’t said anything. Matt always wants to solve things, fix problems.

He says, “I don’t know how you can say that. A dream like that has to mean something. Think about it. You’re dreaming that we are living with your parents in this huge house but we are all crammed into this small part of it. And your parents don’t care if we stay forever but there is no reason why we are still there. It’s not like they are sick or anything. You dream that we have the money but you say we can’t seem to get organised and just leave.” Matt pauses, for breath I guess or maybe to better organise his argument.

“No wonder you are so upset when you wake up. Your mind is trying to tell you something.”

He analyses things to death. I have a dream that recurs. So what? It happens to lots of people. It’s not like we are ever going to live with my parents or his for that matter.

Matt is staring into my eyes pleading for me to join him on this quest for an answer. I look over his shoulder and muffle a sigh.

He can’t help himself.

“You should ask Francis what it means. She loves that stuff; you know palm reading and stuff.”

I can feel my face tighten and I spit out the words.

“Don’t be stupid I can’t do that. I barely know her. I’m not going to tell her my dreams.  Besides she is next door’s baby sitter, it wouldn’t take her long to tell them what I said.”

 “Ok, then you tell me. Think about it. What do you think it means.”

 I wonder if he knows that he is starting to talk to me like I am slow. It is lucky we are at home for I am angry now.

“Matt I don’t know what it means and I know it is hard for you to understand this but I really don’t care either.”

“But if we only talk about it and find the triggers I am sure…”

That’s when I reach across the kitchen table, caress his unshaven cheek and just as he smiles that smug, superior smile I find, with my forefinger, the spot behind the ear lobe and power him down.